Ants in the Pants

The Dingo and I haven't been our usual comedy of errors this week. Both of us have been busy at work (his work much harder/more physically challenging than mine) and I've been a little cranky from my furnace fueled insomnia. So instead of the usual Dingo/Doodle conversations it has been cut down to grunts and "what movie do you want to watch." Today I think we have hit the loony bin side of tired.

Dingo: Look what I got today!

Doodle: Is that one of those things that you spray inspectacide with?

Dingo: Inspectacide?

Doodle: Yeah, that's what it looks like.

Dingo: Well, it sprays insecticide but I'm sure if they ever come up with inspectacide it could spray that too.

The other night I ran across a couple of ants in the house, at which point I freaked out and began convincing the Dingo that if we didn't do something NOW they would take over the house while we slept and we would wake up in a bed filled with ants. So, at about 10 o'clock at night I had the Dingo lurking around the house in the dark spraying for bugs. I guess he decided to buy his new "toy" today to spray something industrial enough that that situation never happens again. Oh, and to raise my excitement about the contraption he stated, "Doodle, it's blue!" Great.

I suppose the good news is that we should be inspect free for a while.

Fiery Furnace Person

I didn't post yesterday, obviously. I thought about logging on to say, "I have a headache. That will be all." But then I remembered how bad my allergies are this time of the year and decided if I told you every time I have a headache I would have to change the title to said phrase and then you would probably stop reading. So for the rest of the spring, I have a headache. That is the last you will hear of that.

The Dingo is going to be working pretty late tonight and is going to pick up dinner on the way home. Since I am hungry NOW and I haven't eaten meat all day I am currently eating the leftover pepperoni from french bread pizzas last night (yes, I consider pepperoni a suitable meal of my day.) Due to the pepperoni the doggy Arleen is sitting here staring at me, raptured. I like to think she is pensively waiting on what Doodle genius makes it to this page, but we all know the truth... she loves me?

Anyway, on to the fiery furnace person. Last night I slept the worst I have a recent memory. The super fun part was about mid morning (3:30am) my insides lit on fire (no in the icky way, gross). It was only 62 degrees in our house and I was dieing of a heat stroke. It was like I was producing the heat. If this keeps up we may never need a heater again. Totally weird. Of course, when I got off work and was informed that I don't need to cook dinner I started thinking of what to do with my time. First thought: Tanning bed. What?! Really Doodle? You, who heated the entire neighborhood last night? Of course, let's go bake your skin. But BOOM! Common sense prevailed at the last minute.

All that is to brag that I used common sense. This happens about as often as Christmas. So I'm about to head out and get a new shower curtain. We have guests in town this weekend and you currently need a shower after you take a shower due to the mildew on my "non mildew" shower curtain. Yick.

We May be Cavemen By the Wedding

The Dingo and I have been together for more that eight years. Somewhere in the middle it was pretty evident that we would get married someday. So for about the past four years the statement "we'll register for it" has been said a bazillion times. Picture me yelling; "Dingo this plate says it was oven safe but it broke into pieces and RUINED THE BRIE!" The Dingo's response is to go buy new plates, a lot of them are chipped anyway. My response is "we'll register for it" but what about the BRIE?!

Just now I was trying to use our electric pepper grinder (yeah, we are lazy like that) and it wouldn't work. The Dingo commented that we should just get one of those big, wooden hand grinders. "Well, I have a BB&B coupon, should I go get one or just register for it?" Register for it.

So, slowly things in our home are getting old and breaking. Now that the ring is on my finger and the wedding date set we more than ever say we'll register for it. However, the wedding is a year away. At this rate, by the wedding I am going to be using wooden mallets and cooking over an open flame in the back yard. I hope the Dingo likes canned beans because that is all I know how to cook over a fire, a la bum style.

Speaking of cooking outside, the Dingo is grilling the pork chops I mention in a recent post. I never got around to cooking them so he is outside doing it now. I'm tasked with cooking purple hull peas (or is it blue? I can never remember). This involves boiled water and peas until the Dingo says dinner is ready. Tough job. But it's Monday and I have something called The Rule of Mondays. This means, I hated every part of the day, I want to go back to bed, if you want something get it your damn self or I will feed your feet to the raccoons in the trees behind our house. He is lucky to be alive and grilling.

I continue my campaign to own a rodent. The Dingo is apposed. But I saw the cutest guinea pig at pet co yesterday. He had his butt in one food bowl and his face in the other. Now that is an animal meant for me. They also have GP carriers! I could totally tote him around like a tiny dog. I take doggy Arleen with me just about everywhere but her 119 pound boo-honk is kind of hard to fit in a carrier. I'm sure she would totally dig it if I could though (yeah, she is lazy like that too). I took pictures, I'll post them soon.

Paint Chips

Ok, so the Dingo has informed me that he, in fact, did not eat glue in kindergarten. The following convo ensued.

Doodle: Everyone tasted paste as a kid.

Dingo: No, not most kids Doodle.

Doodle: You are so making that up! It smelled like mint!

Dingo: Still didn't eat it.

Doodle: So I guess we can file that as evidence #783 of what is wrong with me?

Dingo: I think we are at #784.

Doodle: Whatever, I've lost count at this point.

I can't help but be reminded of the movie Tommy Boy when David Spade asks, "Did you eat paint chips as a kid?" Why no David, I ate paste, thank you very much.

Another storm seems to be rolling into Memphis. That means I have to figure out what to do with these pork chops I just bought since the Dingo doesn't enjoy the sport of monsoon grilling. I'm also going to paint my toes. I'm thinking green will be suitable. I've taken to doing my own mani/pedis and using that money towards tanning. If you don't have olive colored skin you don't understand. I turn the yellowy-green color of olive oil when I am pale. Its not a nice look.

Wow, we sound exciting lately. My "little brother," aka a guy I was raised with so closely that we decided we count as somehow related, will be in town this weekend. He is wanting to show his girlfriend downtown and I think it's music fest so I'm sure craziness will happen. Hopefully something as funny as when our dear friend A got her boots peed on by a drunk stranger at Silky's. (Note: She didn't think it was as funny as I did.)

Dingo and Doodle Sat. Fun: Episode 3

Episode three is coming a day late. Yesterday I was way too busy sneezing and informing the Dingo that I was dieing. So, here we go...

Yesterday a haaaauuuuuge (that's dramatic speak for really big) storm blew through Memphis. Actually, it liked dumping water on us so much it came back a second time later in the afternoon and brought its friend hail along with it. So we were stuck in the house most of the day. When it finally stopped raining it actually turned into a nice afternoon.

I got out and went to the grocery store. I have been craving pears and blue cheese, an addiction I blame on my sister (try it if you never have). The little mom and pop store I usually go to down the street doesn't carry either which meant I had to go back to Kroger. This time I tried one on the opposite side of our neighborhood and WIN! It was totally fine. The other shoppers knew what they were shopping for and wanted to do it quickly, therefore I was able to continue breathing at a healthy pace. While there I also got some shredded lettuce. The momma Dingo always uses it to make salads. The bag says it's intended for tacos and such but I love it for salads. Doodle bites people! I also got this odd greek yogurt and honey combo thing. I haven't tried it yet but I'm optimistic.

I don't like the consistency of yogurt or pudding or anything that feels like eating glue (yeah, I was 5 at what time and it smelled like mint, you did it too, don't lie). But in my experience greek yogurt is thinner and I love honey so I'm thinking I'll love this too. I'll let you know how it goes.

The Dingo had to go into work for a little while yesterday so I watched Where the Wild Things Are since he didn't read the book as a kid and wasn't very interested in seeing it. I cried. I still love that story. Who knew James Ganoldini could bring me to tears without gunfire?

Other than that we watched another movie. I wasn't a fan so I'm not going to write about it. We ordered chinese food. Something else I'm not a fan of. So I ate blue cheese and pears. I was a fan of that.

Well, that's about everything interesting that happened yesterday. Oh, Arleen had terrible gas. You really wanted to know that right? I'm about to head to the tanning bed and figure out what to get the Dingo to put on the grill for dinner. We have some deer sausage but that's not enough for my carnivore. Wait, I just said tanning bed and dead bambi in one paragraph. I've offended someone right? Sorry. But I have engagement pictures coming up (tan) and the Dingo is from North Mississippi, deer happens. Thanks uncle J and the family Dingo!

Brain Dead

I don't have a ton to say tonight. I'm completely worn out. We had a super busy week. T was in town earlier this week and encouraged many late nights. After he left the (soon to be) in-laws came in to town. It's always fun having them visit, we really do enjoy their company and brother Dingo was able to join us too. It's fun now that he is getting older, he is more of a friend than just the little brother. Plus, there is another added benefit; momma Dingo comes to the house prepared to cook for us. I just stand around telling her where stuff is. And we have done this so many times that, at this point, I barely even have to do that. I just eat. They also brought us a huge fish fryer. I don't know what encouraged that but I have an idea the Dingo had something to do with it. He would fry anything. Definitely not in the wedding diet though.

Speaking of wedding, I am making progress on the guest list. Slowly but surely. I have to get moving on this and schedule the engagement photo session soon to get the save the dates ordered. Wow, there is so much that goes into getting married!

One of our creepy spring storms is rolling into Memphis as I type. What a great reason to lay around and do nothing. I think we may even have Chinese food delivered. And that being said, I have to go do something about the back screen door. When it storms the sucker tries to escape. I can hear it sawing off its shackles now. So I have to go latch it in place or else the Dingo will spend the next rain free moment screwing it back onto the house...and I don't want to have to help.

Best Quote EVER

We have a dear friend of our's in town this week. He has been working on a boat and this is his first break in a while. Needless to say he decided to start it off right. The Dingo and I tagged along to both enjoy some time with him and make sure he didn't get too crazy.

We were at a place near our house and said friend was a good way into his third or fourth....soda? Randomly, he looked down the bar at a total stranger and yells the following. Totally unprovoked.

T: Dream crusher! Dream crusher! I spotted you among the other minions you dream crusher! Why are you so against Britnay and Justin getting back together?! DREAM CRUSHER!

I haven't laughed that hard in a long time. There was no explanation. The poor guy just stared back in disbelief.

Moral of the story, I love when T is in town.

Happy Birthday Baby Girl!

Today is my darling little doggy girl's 8th birthday!

(Update: We have a friend in town so I am publishing this a day late)

We have been through a lot in all our time together. We went to college together, hosted parties together and learned what canine seizures are together. That last part wasn't so fun but we have overcome. She brings joy to so many people in our families. She is a demanding brat to my mother but I believe they both need each other and their weekdays just aren't the same without each other. She can make my grandmother light up and I am told she carries treats in her pockets just in case Arleen is in the car when my mom picks her up for a doctors appointment.

She has taught the Dingo and I a serious amount. We are extremely grateful for both the love and the challenges that she has presented us over the past eight years. I look forward to the next eight (or more).

Thanks for being my little girl Arleen!

Dingo and Doodle Sat. Fun: Episode 2

Today was less eventful than last Saturday. There were no LAMB HEADS!!!

My mom was sweet enough to pick me up some new jeans yesterday after commenting that the ones I was wearing were too big. Thanks Mom! And to my surprise the size I asked her to get was too big. Win! So I had to exchange them today. (Side note: they are from Old Navy. I have a hard time fitting into jeans because I have "snake hips." But they have some that fit as well as the super expensive ones I am use to buying. I like the flirt cut.)

Before doing that the Dingo and I went to get sushi. We hadn't ever tried this place before even though it's so close. It was great. We will definitely go again. I may or may not have almost thrown up at the table. Oops. When the Dingo gives me a bite of his food I often say, no, that's not a Doodle bite, make it smaller. I eat in tiny little bites so often I encounter issues when sushi is cut very large. I jammed a whole piece of nigiri in my mouth and after chewing it for three hours I almost didn't get it down. Classy, I know. I'm sure I'll be invited to your next dinner party.

After that we went to what I lovingly refer to as hell, our local Kroger. I have nothing against Kroger but at this specific one I think you have to hand over your brain at the door. It's so busy all the time and people move at a snail's pace. It was, as usual, painful. But I got through it.

We are home now and the Dingo is mowing the lawn. I have Ghost Busters on the TV in the background. I have some memory of my childhood when my mother would (jokingly) ask the horses at the carriages downtown if they were the key master. Haha. Are you the gate keeper? Are you the key master?

The doggy Arleen can't decide if she wants to be outside with the Dingo or inside with me, so every three minutes I have to go let her back in the house. I think I may go sit outside to make this in and out stop.

Dinner is up in the air. I think I'll let the Dingo figure it out.

Magical Cats

The Dingo is currently searching the house for some fancy knife he used to work on the house yesterday. (And by searching, I mean he just looked behind the microwave. Yes, Dingo, that is where you decided to keep your knife.) Anywho, here is a conversation inspired by "there is a lake under the house" death 2010.

Dingo: How is there cat crap under the house?
Doodle: Well, I assume a cat had to use it while it was under our house. There are a lot of cats in the neighborhood.
Dingo: There is no way for a cat to get under our house!
Doodle: Oh...
Dingo: so? HOW IS THERE CAT CRAP UNDER THE HOUSE?!
Doodle: I don't know Dingo. I suppose we have magical crap cats. That's all I can tell you.

We don't own cats by the way. But several of our neighbors seem to be cat people so there are a lot around.

Tonight in order to make up for the junk we have eaten this week we had grilled chicken and roasted veggies. And this time I did not burn the chicken. And that being said, I didn't burn the chicken the last time either. I burnt the marinade onto the pan, the chicken was fine. (Dingo, I am talking to you!)

Sinking

Well, the "lake under the house" death of 2010 turned out to not be that big of a deal. The Dingo had someone come out and fix it today for only $150. Win! The guy noticed another small leak so one of our super talented and always helpful friends (thanks Ubaldo!) came by tonight and helped the Dingo patch it. Lucky for me this meant I couldn't use the sink until they were finished working. That means no cooking. Don't get me wrong, I love to cook but two nights in a row without it was a nice break. I picked up High Point Pizza. One of my favs. Grossly fattening dinner two nights in a row? Yep. I'm not the healthiest eater but this is bad even for me. Tomorrow night we'll be back in routine. And currently all...I mean ALL...of our towels are getting washed. Overflowing washing machines require a lot of towels for clean up. Don't tell doggy Arleen though. She has some sixth sense about when all the towels are clean and manages to dirty them all with one mess or the other. Or both.

I have finally sat down and typed up the wedding guest list. There isn't a single physical address but the entire wedding party has email addresses and phone numbers. I think that is progress. At least that is one thing I've started on. Oh, and I set up a registry. I only registered for two things but, again, progress.

Something I have failed to mention; every day I take Arleen to her granny's house before work and pick her up afterward. Just like a child. I hate the idea of Arly being home alone if she has a seizure. Also, my mom walks her three times a day and caters to her every demand. The dog is spoiled. And now Arly's favorite time of year has arrived. My parents' pool has been uncovered. My dog treats my parents' house like a spa year round but she is crazy diva when the pool is open. She walks in at the stairs in the shallow end and just wades around. She doesn't even use her hind legs. She just paddles around with the front two until she is nice and cool. Then she goes dripping into my parent's kitchen and my mother follows her around mopping up. Hearing about this behavior makes you ask, why does the Dingo get shocked when I am being a demanding brat. Duh. Arleen ran errands with her daddy today and is now snoring on the floor, resting up for her big day of swimming tomorrow.

The season of Glee started tonight. Wheee! Love that show. I'm sure I will be up late waiting for the Dingo to go to sleep so I can watch the DVR. Also, I'm too lazy to schlep the laptop over to the desk so I have been slumped over at a bar stool outside the kitchen working for several hours. I think it's about time to schlep myself over and slump on the couch. The Dingo is watching Pawn Stars. I love that guy's laugh.

Got it!

Thanks to help from the Dingo I got my dead gum purse out of the closet.

He bought me this a couple of years ago. Ok, no he didn't. He handed me a wrapped box and as I opened it said, "If you don't like it we can return it." I politely said how cute the bag was and promptly asked if he knew if the Coach store was still open to exchange it. I mean, if you are going to spend that amount on something to carry my crap in shouldn't I love it? So, this is what turned out. And it's been a long time fav. Ok, I guess I should show you what the Dingo's answer to my shoe/purse craziness has resulted in. Ugh.
Those shoes go two rows back and there is another shelf above that. The clothes on the rack are winter clothes and to the right are the purses. I'm not an avid shopper but I keep EVERYTHING. This has benefited me many times. Those silver heals in front have been in many a wedding. That is supposed to be our linen closet. There are sheets at the very very top of the closet. This is one of three of my closets. I'm telling you! Keep it classic and not trendy and a few years from now you may love it again. Oh, and the New Balance shoes in the pic? I wore them once in a year to walk the farting machine. Me work out? You're funny. I even ride the lifecycle barefoot.

Fried Chicken and Mashed Potatoes

I wasn't originally planning on posting tonight. However, the washing machine is flooding AGAIN so the Dingo is downstairs attempting to remedy that which means I am bored.

Over the weekend I was a cooking machine. I made ribs, egg & olive salad, lamb, mashed potatoes and hummus. So tonight we had this...Every night I come home and ask the Dingo what he wants for dinner and every night (mostly just to annoy me) he says fried chicken and mashed potatoes. Well, tonight he got his wish. I prefer Popeye's but there isn't one around here so we settle for Church's. I guess a healthy (?) dose of fat and grease is good now and again. I certainly didn't feel much like cooking.

News flash: I just came back from being downstairs talking to the Dingo who was under the house. A pipe that connects to both the sink and the washing machine has a hole in it. This is not good news. It does, however, explain why our house has been smelling musty the last week or so. He is currently on the phone with someone asking if they know how to fix it. Lucky for us we have great, talented friends that have done everything from help fix our air ducts to fixing my car. So hopefully this will remain true when it comes to pipes. Fingers crossed.

Anyway, I hate the purse I recently bought. HATE. I have been using it to avoid more scorn from the Dingo who was pissed I bought it in the first place. Whatever. I give up. It's ugly. I think I may go back to the Coach that I love. The problem is, in effort to organize my craziness, the Dingo hung all of my purses in a closet, requiring me to lift the hanger bar up and dig through levels of purses to get to the one I want. Ugly purse, you have found reprieve. Cherish it while it lasts.

In other news, the Dingo installed Office on my computer tonight. I guess that means it's time to start making this wedding guest list official. Blah. Am I the total anti-bride? Why can't I just show up a year from now and the wedding and reception just happen? Also, is it impossible to find a simple dress?! I have only looked online so far but everything is lace and glitter. I just want something plain. The jewelry will bring the glitter. Maybe I will finally try on some dresses this weekend and be more hopeful. I also have got to start looking into caterers. Ugh. My mom is totally pumped about food tasting. Good. She and L can taste cakes. I hate cake. Give me cheese or give me death.

News update: The Dingo is staying home tomorrow to get a plumber. This doesn't sound good. I've heard the phrases "lake under my house," "water is shooting out," and "Nik this isn't good." All littered with some key four letter words. Ah oh. Looks like going into the purse archives will be necessary if I want to have something I like. Super.

And to brighten your Monday (Tuesday?) here is the thing snoring on the floor next to me.

YAMS

So my super talented mother painted this picture for me five years ago. She use to sing "You are my sunshine" to me as a kid and still sings cards and what not with "Love Mom, YAMS."
I was looking at this while I dried my hair today and thought; these would be totes cute shoes in real life. I would lose the bow, raise the heal and put a little platform on the sole. But seriously? All those straps? Love. Shoe are my sunshine.

Exclamation

I just realized the amount of exclamation points I used in that last post. Oops. Sorry for that but lamb head will have that effect on a person. LAMB HEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Dingo and Doodle Sat. Fun: Episode 1

The Dingo and I often have places to be on Saturdays. People visiting, birthdays, what not. So when a weekend comes that we don't have plans it calls for adventure. This often involves me cooking something. Today was one of those days.

I was nursing a sinus headache most of the morning (the Allergy Monster has come!). So around lunch we decided what to do today and came to decide on grilling ribs. We went to Charlie's Meat Market to get some. The Dingo is usually the rib guy but I decided today I'll do everything but the actual grill part. I haven't ever learned to use a charcoal grill so he is going to be my sous-chef for the day.
After leaving Charlie's I decided it was time to visit the Jerusalem Market next door. The Dingo loves lamb and you can't find it often so we decided to give it a shot. I went straight for the butcher counter...no lamb. So the Dingo asked the kid behind the counter (am I so old now that I call people kids?!) if they had lamb. I was eyeing a giant thing of olives when the Dingo said, look Nik! I did not expect to look up to a cooler door opened to show at least five whole lambs hanging in there! The store workers were quite entertained when I screamed OH DEAR GOD! Was totally not expecting that. Then I looked at the butcher board. You can buy a lamb head! Yes, I said h.e.a.d! Blech.

We forwent the head and asked for the chops. The butcher gave us some options and enthusiastically said, well, I can give you the neck too! Oh dear God X2! I decided on just the chops. Now I have to figure out what to do with these things. That will be tomorrow's debacle. Wish me luck.

I can't be in such a fun store without buying more. So, I asked the owner some questions about homemade hummus. I've done it myself before but it's just never as good as the true Med places. He was so sweet to take me around the store and pick out all his favorite ingredients (there are only 4-5 depending on how you make it). And he gave me tips about how he makes his (he adds cumin, I've never heard of that). So it was well worth going. Try it sometime!

I helped!

I'm sitting down to write this a little early tonight. That would be because tonight's dinner is what I like to call Easiest Thing Ever. We are having Shake N Bake and mac and cheese. I always wrote off Shake n Bake because I thought, hell, I can season bread crumbs! But in a moment of just needing to get something on the table and being tired I bought the mix. And it's actually really good and doesn't involve eggs or milk for the dredge so there is minimal clean up. Win! I'm also making mac and cheese out of the box. I usually try to cook everything from scratch but I've always preferred the blue box to homemade. Plus, rue and I have a very rocky relationship. Maybe I'm impatient or it's one of those "easy" basics that gets me every time. Want me to make up a pasta sauce based on what I have in the pantry? Done. Make a simple rue? Head explosion.

It's been gross out today and I am now hearing thunder through the window next to me. However, it hasn't dampened my desire to start shopping for spring/summer dresses. I am a dress hoarder. I'd wear them every day if I could. The fact that Hoarders is currently on the TV might be the universe (or the Dingo) warning me. I may have an issue with dresses (and shoes, and purses). Old home means tiny closets. The Dingo has been sentenced to the guest room closet. There just isn't enough room.

Alright, the oven is about to buzz that my culinary feat of amazing, magical mystery excellence is ready to eat. Also, every time the Dingo leaves the room his computer starts playing some weird power point screen saver with some awesome 80's elevator music. I'm going to have to figure out what that junk is about and how to put a stop to it. Next spoken sentence will be: DINGO! What the crap is that junk coming out of your computer.

The header picture

Just so you know, the header picture is from the Dingo and my vacation in San Francisco a couple of years ago. I wish I had a great Memphis picture to use but we are terrible about taking pictures. In fact, we just recently located our camera. So maybe there will be a new header some day. But this one was taken at the entrance of Chinatown in San Fran. No, I didn't actually kiss the statue. I prefer not to place lips to public objects. It's just one of those quirky things about me. ;)

water bottles, pens and pasta, oh my

Well, today was mostly uneventful and yet involved one of my favorite parts of my job. Shopping. I work in marketing and along with my copy writing and editing I also pick out our client give aways. This sounds totally silly but I love it. I pick out our company pens and note pads as well as other random stuff. My current WE NEED THIS campaign is Nalgene bottles with the company logo. I'm a Nalgene devotee. If you see me at work, I most likely have a pink one in hand. I try to drink 64 ounces of water a day and that sweet label on the bottle keeps me in check. Anyway, I have decided we should spread the hydrating wealth and part of my day involved visiting Outdoors Inc. to find test colors. Yep kids, I'm saving lives one ounce of water at a time. So exciting.

In other Tuesday news, I made pasta bolognese for the first time tonight. I think it was probably the most unhealthy thing I've made in a while. Bacon cooked in butter, ground beef and heavy cream are not in the wedding diet. Oh well. It turned out well and I used whole wheat pasta as some sort of heart attack redemption. I hate... hate ...hate recipes that call for half a cup of white wine. I don't drink white wine so it's a total waste. So, I added some extra beef broth and saved myself $10.

Our wedding is one year from next friday. So I suppose I should start planning finally. The dingo has one week to finish contacting the groomsmen and asking them to be in the wedding. He just has two left. That is two out of nine. Yep, nine. There may be more people at the alter than in the church. Today's topic of conversation was the reception gifts. I'm thinking about boxes of personalized M&Ms. I'm pretty sure our guests don't want some keepsake that says Nikkerdoodle and the Dingo. At least this way they get chocolate. Thoughts? What kind of stuff did y'all give?

Day one

Well, here we are. I suppose I should introduce myself. I'm a southern girl but not country by any means. I met the man that you will come to know as the dingo 8 years ago. He is very much my best friend and I rarely spend time without him. That being said, I will not make you barf any further.
I'm a writer. Even more than that I am an editor. While I pride myself on my own creations I find that I am rediculously good at telling you when you screwed up. Aside from the dingo my partner in crime is this big, fat, farting lump on the floor beside me. That would be Ms. Arleen the Mississippi Queen. Our lives turn around that farting animal. She is epileptic. We live our lives around her and her need for habits. If you ever have a dog with this problem please email me. We are the king and queen of what my dad calls the "defective dog."
So, now that we are friends, I hope you'll be nice enough and read this now and again. Please even feel free to tell me that I'm an ass. You're probably right.
Oh! and in case you are wondering; the name southern magnolia is because our song is Greatful dead sugar magnolia but some ass already took that URL. And the dingo got his title from the Seinfeld episode where the woman keeps saying "my faince!" until at some point elane says the dingo at your baby! i'd much rather say dingo anyway.